The 3Cs of unaccomplished goals

As this year draws to an end, I recently decided to sit down to do a review. This made me consider my next steps with regards to goals I had not fulfilled. For ease I decided to classify them into three categories which I call my 3Cs as outlined below:

Complete

Although I feel like putting my feet up after all my hard work this year, I reasoned that I am still able to actually cross the finish line and complete one or two goals with extra effort and planning.

Continue

Whereas with some other goals, I have decided I can work on some action points that will bring me closer to accomplishing my goals but they won’t be completed this year.

Carry over

Lastly, for the remaining goals I have decided to put them on hold until next year and carry on where I stopped.

 

The process of attributing my goals to the above three categories has taken a lot of pressure off me and regardless of how my year has gone, I am totally satisfied knowing full well I gave my goals my best shot and my year ended with some brilliant wins.

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Don’t write yourself off!

I am currently job hunting. In this process, I have come across some job specifications I think are beyond me (limited experience) and quickly move on to the next vacancy. However some days ago I came across this particular job I would love to do. Although I don’t fit the criteria 100% I believe I stand a chance after viewing the OU on the BBC: Hilary Devey’s Women at the Top documentary some days ago. The main thing I took away from Hilary is; as a woman I need to have more confidence in myself and portray myself in that light.

 

In 2007 I applied for a post through an agency and heard nothing. A week later I found out the company in question also advertised the job on their website. I decided to apply directly to them and got the job. Similarly, my application for secondment to another department this summer was successful simply because of a course I did six years ago. Bottom line is I would not get a job if I don’t try.

It is so easy for us to disqualify ourselves even before others have done so and even if they do I will ensure I get feedback, take it on board and carry on till my goal is accomplished.

This principle is applicable to any area of life, even if others do not believe in you, don’t stop believing in yourself. Do whatever is required to qualify yourself so when opportunity does come knocking, success is only a matter of time.

 

Specify

The woman with vague and vagrant hopes

Is always hanging on the ropes

Or vainly sparring with the air

Because she sees what is not there

She who builds a house must plan

The kind of house, the height, the span

And know the stuff with which to build

If she would have her dream fulfilled

And she must know down to the penny

The size of nails, the style, how many

Do you want fir or oak or pine?

You’ll have to lay it on the line

The truth cuts sharper than a knife

To build a home or build a life

There is one law you must apply

Author Unknown

Lost Passion Syndrome (LPS)

Passion is the key to success, fulfilment, energy, greatness and influence. But as we journey through life; challenges, tragedy and failure can cause us to abandon our passion.

I set off some years ago with a big vision to set up a hub where women from all walks of life could come together to inspire one another, acquire knowledge and tools to succeed in all areas of life and make a difference in their sphere of influence. Three years into my mission, tragedy struck. I lost my first baby on what was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life. Nine months after I lost my second baby.

Life went on but I had no desire to pursue my passion due to the amount of work, commitment and energy required and the absence of finance and human capital contributed to my reasons for quitting.

But somehow I found myself being drawn back to my vision three years later. I have come to realise that this is what I was born for, this is where I get my excitement from and it is here I can make a difference. But it was not business as usual. My loss has enabled me see and do things differently. What I do now has greater meaning and purpose and my experience colours everything I do as I underwent a paradigm shift. Hence my dream have come alive in greater depth and with immense impact. The interesting thing I find as I go along is how all the pieces of my ‘life goal’ fits into this cause as some many things I have planned to accomplish in life can be tied into this vision.

My lost passion syndrome has moved me beyond loss, beyond financial barriers and beyond stagnancy. I am back doing what I love!

Taking charge of my Time!

From time to time I hear people say if only there was more than 24 hours in the day, I can accomplish much more. As this is impossible, it is best to accept that all you and I have each day is 24 hours and critically decide to utilise each minute and hour to its best. I have found the following principles helpful when managing my time.

  • Prioritise: like everyone else, I have so many responsibilities, a number of tasks on my to – do list and demands from others. But I always ask myself these questions: What needs my attention now? What can’t wait until tomorrow? If I don’t attend to this right now what are the consequences if any?
  • Plan: I have found out I am more effective and in control of my day when I think ahead and write things down in my diary. This helps me focus on issues that really matter. My memory is not as good as it used to be, the only way I can keep on top of things is to write everything down. Even with the greatest intentions and plans, things may not turn out as envisaged, try not to get stressed about it, get back to the planning board and re-plan.
  • Postpone: everything you pay attention to requires time so if it is unplanned for, endeavour to delay it for a more suitable time unless it is an emergency. I am learning not to pick up calls if I am in the middle of something as this interrupts what I am doing. If I can deal with the phone call later, then I will do so. Sometimes people need you to assist them and either come to you at the last minute or a time convenient for them (and not you). It is okay to let them know how you  prefer to operate. Do so in a kind and diplomatic way and in some instances you may need to say ‘no’ to others if you can justify your reasons and don’t feel guilty.
  • Practical: there are days I set out to achieve so much and little is accomplished, this frustrates me. On reviewing my plans, I have picked out that I am sometimes not  realistic. Considering the fact I have two kids under 5 (which is a job in itself) I need to leave room for the unexpected and the unplanned for. Having said that, of recent I am more disciplined with my children’s routines and this has helped immensely. Of course with a little room for flexibility. Nowadays, I tend to set myself fewer tasks for each day that are realistic and achievable and I find out I get to complete other tasks I did not intend to complete that day as far as I am in the mood.
  • Pleasure: it is very important to put my feet up after a busy day. But watching TV for extensive periods (it depends on what you are watching though, as far as I am concerned watching ‘soaps’ add no value to me) or spending hours on face book is something I have cut back on drastically this is no longer the best way for me to relax and I haven’t got the time anyway.  I would rather spend my calming down time on therapeutic activities.
  • Perception: I am aware I am generally a morning person and it is best to dedicate the best part of my day to important things. Usually once I have had my dinner my day has ended and  I prefer not to carry out any tasks unless deemed absolutely necessary. All I want to do is sit and relax. Hence when working on  my goals  I take into account when I am most productive and use this to my advantage.

Time as they say flies, but you are the pilot. So steer time in the direction you want it to go!

There’s no stopping me now

 

When we set out to accomplish our goals there are so many things both internal and external that may stand in our way of achieving them. From my observation, the presence of the following six things in your life can expedite this journey.

  • Reality check – a friend of mine recently received her pension forecast and that gave her the push to step out and start the business she conceived many years ago. We need to get to a point when you realise things would not change if you carry on with business as normal. Would you be happy with your current state ten, twenty, fifty years from now? If no, it is time to change directions as your actions today shape your outcome tomorrow
  • Good friends – you cannot underestimate the power of good friends who have your interest at heart, who tell you as it is, who encourage you to become the best you and stand by you in your low times.  Spend time with people who motivate you to spread your wings and fly at the set time. Avoid  hanging out with people who are going no where, surround yourself with people who are heading in the same direction as you and have already attained what you are working towards
  • Self discipline – I hear people comment every now and again I wish each day had more than 24 hours. Even if it did, we would still need more time. The key is learning to manage and maximise the time you have. It is a great idea to assess how you currently spend your time; where time is being wasted, how much time is required daily, weekly and monthly to allocate to your goals, set the time aside for this. Guard this time jealously as many things would seek to interrupt you but you must be determined to keep your focus.
  • You have what you need – there are many times I have stopped myself from going forward due to a lack of resources. I have grown to understand that conditions don’t need to be perfect; I have learnt the art of improvisation, using what I have personally and around me (i.e. social capital) to get what I want. Start small and grow your concept.
  • Relevant knowledge – things are much easier when you possess the appropriate knowledge in the areas you are embarking upon. Acquiring knowledge is a continuous process. Being a learner for life is the key to greatness.
  • Great advice – I love the saying that there is nothing new under the sun, in essence someone somewhere has an understanding of where you are going and what it takes to get there. Listen and learn from others and then proceed by applying innovative principles to your idea(s).

So there is nothing to stop you from getting what you want. Would you stop yourself?

Awake Coaching

 Awake Coaching provides a personal and professional telephone coaching service for women worldwide who have recognised the need to change a situation from what it is to what they want it to be. For more information contact the Ladies Club; wmw_lclub@yahoo.com

7 things that can hinder you from achieving your goals!

A good place to start when setting GOALS is to ensure they are SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and within a set Timeframe). Its nearly the end of March, if you haven’t already done so, now is a good time to review your goals and assess your progress so far.

The following questions can help you kick start this process:

  • What went well?
  • What could I have done differently?
  • What is stopping me?
  • Who/what  can help me in achieving my goals?
  • Where do I go from here?

Setting SMART goals is not enough. Below are 7 factors that can hold you back from realising your goals.

  • Self Limiting beliefs: what we believe has great power to influence the results we get. Sometimes these convictions are entrenched in our sub conscious. Identify and address these self limiting beliefs either  yourself or with the help of a Coach
  • Fear of the Unknown: I once read somewhere that life is a risk. Personally I have found out from experience after mustering courage to take action that what I feared was actually nothing to be afraid of. FEAR has been described as false evidence appearing real. So before you back down consider if what you are afraid of is based on false or true evidence.
  • Other people’s opinion: people around you would have their opinions on why you should or should not proceed with your goal. Do listen to constructive criticisms, spend time doing your homework and step out when you should
  • No vision: Myles Munroe defined ‘vision as the idea that never leaves you, the dream that won’t go away and the passion that won’t subside.’ It does not matter how many times you get discouraged, how tough things are, your vision provides you with revelation, hope and foresight to make your goals happen
  • Comparison: trying to do things the way others have done it stifles creativity, innovation and your uniqueness. Learn from others but put your stamp on your approach. Be you!
  • Past mistakes: your past is not necessarily an indication of your future. Do learn from your past experience and use it as a spring board to attain your goals
  • Lack of tenacity: goals don’t come cheap and to achieve them you have to do whatever it takes (ethically) to accomplish it. Don’t be discouraged by closed doors, long hours, lack of finance or gate keepers. Keep at it because all the tiny drops of water would eventually become a mighty ocean.

As you continue on the path to achieving your goals, remember to find time for yourself and others!

 

Awake Coaching

Awake Coaching provides a personal and professional telephone coaching service for women worldwide who have recognised the need to change a situation from what it is to what they want it to be. For more information contact the Ladies Club; wmw_lclub@yahoo.com